Outside the Gate

It’s a park we happen to walk by every day on the way to and back from school.

Early on, I had to explain to my kids that, well, we just aren’t welcome inside the well-appointed black gates of Gramercy Park because, we don’t live in the immediate vicinity.

I’m not sure of the exact protocol, but — as I’ve always understood it, anyway — to be eligible to enter this highly coveted patch of well-coiffured urban verdancy, one must be a bona fide resident of the surrounding community (or a guest of the Gramercy Park Hotel) to be given a key to enter. Unless you can claim to live off the comely square itself, …. tough tits, toots ... you ain’t gettin’ in.

As such, I always feel a twinge of envy and, frankly, resentment when I spy someone lounging inside Gramercy Park. I can’t be the only petty person that feels that way. Can I?

About a month or so back, I was walking back from school with my kids and rounding the corner of East 21st Street onto Gramercy Square. As we crossed over onto the park-side of the street, we watched a large man in some strikingly ill-fitting track pants leisurely exit the gate on the eastern side of the park. The door did not fully close as he ambled south. It stopped just short of its latch.

Wordlessly, I locked eyes with my kids. My little Charlotte even deftly moved into position towards the entrance, silently ready to slip inside. At the last possible moment, however, Johnny Trackpants paused, corrected himself and jogged back to firmly close the gate behind him, entirely oblivious to the reality that the elite sanctity of the private park to which he was privy had come perilously close to being breached by keyless infidels such as we.

This all begs a serious question, though: Is there an actual penalty for being caught in Gramercy Park without a key? Is it essentially trespassing?

When we heard that gate firmly click shut and lock, my kids and I discreetly exhaled in frustration.

Next time, though …. we will be ready!

CRAZY ADDENDUM: My ever-savvy high school pal Lela pointed me in the direction of this article from the New York Times from a few years back that details the particulars. It gives me pause, however, as evidently, you need a KEY TO EXIT THE PARK!!!!