I entered the workforce pretty promptly after I graduated from college (landing my first quasi-official "job" as an upaid intern at SPIN in the summer of 1989). Since those balmy, carefree days, however, as I've gradually climbed the ladder towards more respectable titles, I've noticed a recent uptick in insufferable corporate lingo. It's been more rife at certain organizations than at others, but I'm worryingly starting to notice it that it's slowly spilling out of the office environment and starting to infect the lexicon of everyday, out-of-office speak. This will not do. As such, here's a handy guide of terms and phrases you need to stop earnestly using at once, whether you're standing in a monolithic, corporate tower of imposing glass and steel or reaching into your friend's fridge for a cold beer on a Saturday night. You'll thank me later.
In no order....
- Sweet spot
- Iterative
- Wheelhouse
- Granular
- Offerings
- Bandwidth
- Evangelize
- Ask (used as a friggin' noun instead of question, query or request)
- Learning (used as a friggin' noun)
- Effort (used as a friggin' verb)
- "Moving the dial"
- Ping
- Powow
- "Gentle reminder"
- "Own it"
- Jenky
- "Low hanging fruit" (I've been combatting this with "easily accessible vegetables")
- "Drill down"
- "Net net"
- "Apples to apples"
- "Shitshow"
Which ones am I missing?
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