I was roused from my slumber this morning around 4:30 am by the anguished entreaties of my three-month old son. Upon stepping out of bed and setting my foot down on the floor, my left calve seized up as if an invisible Pit Bull had clamped his weapons-grade jaws onto it, sending me spiraling to the floor. This was an intensity of pain I can't say I've experienced since breaking my arm while skiing back in high school. Not the greatest way to start one's day.
After a little research, I discovered that this particular muscle cramp is largely referred to as a "Charley Horse," a term which always reminds me of the cocktails my parents used to drink with names like "the Harvey Wallbanger" and 'The Rammer."
In any case, evidently these types of cramps are symptomatic of either a depletion of electrolytes (i.e. dehydration) and/or simply not stretching prior to a big excercise session. Being that I'm not doing any real excercising these days (apart from carrying my bowling-ball like newborn around on my shoulder and chasing after my tireless two-year old), I can only assume it's because I drink water as often as I drink sulfuric acid and that I don't eat nearly enough fruit (although that's because I'm allergic to about nine-tenths of the Fruit Kingdom). I'll be amending those practices toute suite.
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