Release the Bats and Damn the Deodorant

Riddle me this, Batman: How does one maintain one's sartorial integrity as a Goth in 97° heat (which, with the humidity, really feels more 120°)? I just walked by a gaggle of aspiring Gothic teens, clad from head to toe in baggy black clothes. Now don't get me wrong. I like Skinny Puppy and Bauhaus as much as the next guy, and I boast an inordinate amount of black in my wardrobe too, but c'mon people! It's like the surface of the goddamn sun out there. Here's a helpful newsflash: Wearing lightweight, light-colored clothing reflects away the sun's rays more than dark colors, which absorb the sun's rays. Put on a white tank-top, fer cryin' out loud. Don't worry, Andrew Eldritch would do the same. Sheesh!