I mentioned it in passing not too long back, but tomorrow I depart New York City for a week at DisneyWorld with my wife and children. If truth be told, it's not the first vacation destination I would have chosen, but then -- I wasn't the one doing the choosing. Through the loving beneficence of some family members, we are being whisked to the Orlando stronghold of all things Mouse as a combined birthday present for my two kids. Like I said, I would have preferred about a quadrillion other places, but none of this is about me, which is fine. I am indescribably grateful for the opportunity to treat my kids to this trip, although the notion of visiting DisneyWorld does strike me as a somewhat odious affair. At the very least, it will be an interesting sociological experience.
I was actually taken to DisneyWorld as a child myself, although that was in 1979 when it was still a quasi-manageable affair. Even the slightest perusal of the DisneyWorld website now is enough to induce a crippling headache. Not including a pair of water parks (which I'm strenuously hoping to be able to side-step), there are now four major parks; the Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Disney's Hollywood Studios and Disney's Animal Kingdom. Put simply, the place is fucking VAST.
Being that my little folk are only 5 and 7, I'm thinking we're going to cross Epcot and the Hollywood Studios right off the list from the get-go. I've heard amazing things about a "Twilight Zone" ride at the latter, but I'm sure I'd be the only member of our foursome to want to go on that. So, that's out.
The kids, meanwhile, can barely contain themselves. I'm concerned that they might be a bit overwhelmed by the enormity of the experience, but then, I'm afraid for myself in that capacity as well. At the end of the day, so long as they're kept happy and giggling all day, it will be an easy mission to accomplish.
In any case, I've been steeling myself up as best I can for the coming days. We're staying literally on campus at the Magic Kingdom (which, I worryingly gather, is entirely "dry," which might make unwinding at the end of a long day of Disney's "imagineering" a tad challenging). At least it'll be warm and there'll be a pool. Looking forward to that.
Beyond that, I'm trying to keep my sharply-fanged cynicism in check, because -- again -- none of this is about me. Maybe I'll luck out and find one of those since-cancelled Joy Division shirts left (or, better yet, one of the Crass ones), but I'm not holding my breath.
Stand by for updates.