Well, it's the end of another year here at Flaming Pablum. Under normal circumstances, I post a video clip of U2 blustering their way histrionically through "New Year's Day," but is it me, or has that joke just gotten way too old? Even though I'm not doing that, I am going to revisit this lame survey one more time. Enjoy. Happy New Year.
What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before? Speak on a panel.
Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year? I don't believe I made any. I am tempted to make one this year, but that almost guarantees that I won't accomplish the goal, so perhaps it’s best that I don't bother.
Did anyone close to you give birth? My managing editor at the job had a baby. Or his wife did, I should say.
Did anyone close to you die? We had a very close call right before Christmas, but mercifully everyone's still with us.
What countries did you visit? None besides this one.
What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009? Full-time employment status somewhere.
What date from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory? While there were a few momentous occasions and big events this year, I can't honestly say that any one specific date has any special resonance.
What was your biggest achievement of the year? Remaining employed.
What was your biggest failure? Not landing a specific job I was interviewing quite seriously for in the early summer.
Did you suffer illness or injury? I had a lengthy bout with a Kidney Stone that made me wish my parents had never met. My children had to deal with everything from Scarlet Fever and The Croup to a tenacious strain of head lice.
Whose behavior merited celebration? My wife Peggy for being an unflinching rock of awesomeness.
Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? The wingnut Republican "tea baggers." Please go die.
Where did most of your money go? Kids' tuition & the fine makers of Sapporo beer
What did you get really, really excited about? The prospect of landing a certain job (that, sadly, did not come to fruition). That said, I was then hugely relieved and psyched to return to my seat at the previous gig (where I am now).
What song will always remind you of 2009? Specifically about 2009? Hmmm. This might sound weird, but I'll go with "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga
Compared to this time last year, are you happier or sadder? About the same, really.
Thinner or fatter? Probably fatter (no scale in our home)
Richer or poorer? Certainly feel poorer, but probably about the same.
What do you wish you'd done more of? Working/earning.
What do you wish you'd done less of? Beer-drinking.
How did you spend Christmas? With the family.
Who did you spend the most time on the phone with? No idea.
Did you fall in love in 2009? Only with inanimate objects like my iPhone
How many one night stands in this last year? Zero. I'm very happily married.
What was your favorite TV program? "Collision" on BBC-America
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? Beyond idiotic public figures like the Gosselins, Hennes & the Salahis, no. The usual suspects still fire my ire.
What was the best book you read? "Under the Banner of Heaven" by Jon Krakauer
What did you want and get? After my years of grousing about it, I finally got a turntable (for Christmas)
What did you want and not get? A staff position somewhere
What were your favorite films of this year? Nothing current. I can count the movies I went to this year on one hand and still have a few free fingers.
What did you do on your birthday, and who old were you? Kept things low-key. I'm 42 now. Ugh.
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Beyond the laboriously over-cited full-time-employee status somewhere, probably the untimely demise of Glen Beck, Dick Cheney or Sarah Palin.
How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009? Beergut Obfuscation
What celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? None spring to mind.
What political issue stirred you the most? Gay Marriage. Let them have it. Let's all evolve, shall we?
Who did you miss? Several friends & former co-workers. They're all still alive, but I just didn't see that much of them.
Who was the best new person you met? Probably my tirelessly entertaining colleague Drew.
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009? Drink a lot of goddamn water. Kidney stones suck.
Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
And all the world's babies are crying still/While all the police cars harmonize with power drills/As jets and kettles form a chord with screeching gulls/Accompanied by truncheons keeping time on human skulls
- "Across this Antheap" by XTC